Get weird. Get A Crazy T-Shirt.
When you're harvesting diamond babies from the red rivers, you don't need a bunch of people wondering what you're up to. Wearing a crazy t-shirt may keep folks from bothering you, so it might be a good idea to grab one and tie it around your unicorn-bashing arm as a warning flag. If people do happen to get within your personal germ-bubble, then you can just eat their brain.
Quit screaming, you silly goose. I don't eat normal brains. I only eat special brains. I've learned as much as I can from eating smart brains, so it takes quite a bit to make me want to bother with a normal person's brain. Once you eat Einstein's brain, all the others taste pretty bland.
I stay up way too late at night on my typical unicorn-hunt evenings. When I get up in the morning, I really feel like I'm a real zombie and not just pretending to be one. My joints are stiff, my eyes are swimming, and my pulse is way too low. If I didn't score a good unicorn brain, or at least a horn, the night before then I'm not worth very much the next day. I hate doing it, but a human brain comes in handy when I feel that bad.
What's with all the werewolves chilling out with the unicorns? There was a time in the not-too-distant past when I could score one, maybe two, unicorn brains in a single night. I could usually grab a princess brain too, but not any more. Now the stupid unicorns hang out with werewolves all night. I can't mess with werewolves. I'm allergic to them.
Making yourself crazy is simple. It doesn't take much more than making 2+2=1,453 in your head once or twice and all of those doors in your mind open at once and let the bat monsters out. Wearing a crazy t-shirt every day for a month helps too. It's very liberating to be crazy like me. You can just kick back, eat a few unicorn brains, drink your cough syrup, and think about how great the color triangle is.
Quit screaming, you silly goose. I don't eat normal brains. I only eat special brains. I've learned as much as I can from eating smart brains, so it takes quite a bit to make me want to bother with a normal person's brain. Once you eat Einstein's brain, all the others taste pretty bland.
I stay up way too late at night on my typical unicorn-hunt evenings. When I get up in the morning, I really feel like I'm a real zombie and not just pretending to be one. My joints are stiff, my eyes are swimming, and my pulse is way too low. If I didn't score a good unicorn brain, or at least a horn, the night before then I'm not worth very much the next day. I hate doing it, but a human brain comes in handy when I feel that bad.
What's with all the werewolves chilling out with the unicorns? There was a time in the not-too-distant past when I could score one, maybe two, unicorn brains in a single night. I could usually grab a princess brain too, but not any more. Now the stupid unicorns hang out with werewolves all night. I can't mess with werewolves. I'm allergic to them.
Making yourself crazy is simple. It doesn't take much more than making 2+2=1,453 in your head once or twice and all of those doors in your mind open at once and let the bat monsters out. Wearing a crazy t-shirt every day for a month helps too. It's very liberating to be crazy like me. You can just kick back, eat a few unicorn brains, drink your cough syrup, and think about how great the color triangle is.
About the Author:
To fill your brain about funny tshirts go to cool apparel to see how it's done right.
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